The Gospel vs. Feminism- FALSE DICHOTOMY

Last night, a group of friends and I were having dinner, when my friends brought up a previous conversation they had over feminism and the gospel. From what I understood, someone said something negative about feminism, and the two females there defended it, and after going back and forth a bit, one guy finally made the statement that if the gospel was preached to everyone, there wouldn't be a need for feminism.

Well that shut the conversation up because who was going to argue against the gospel of Jesus Christ? (They were all practicing Mormons) Plus, it made sense, right? After all, feminism was/ is a reaction to patriarchal oppression, and so if ideally everyone lived the gospel as they should, there wouldn't be any form of bullying, oppression and discrimination. Everyone would treat each other kindly and as equals, thus there wouldn't be a need for feminism.

Yet, something didn't sit quite right to me. As I pondered this issue, I finally realized what didn't feel right-- it was this dichotomy that feminism is antithetical to the gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't think my friends intentionally set up this dichotomy, and I don't think they even realized that they did, but essentially it pitted feminism against the gospel. Because if everyone had and lived the gospel, we wouldn't need feminism.

And this was what I disagreed with because to me, THE GOSPEL IS ABOUT FEMINISM, and you can't separate the two. I am a feminist because I am a Mormon. I'm not a feminist "despite"/ "in spite of" being a Mormon. Rather, living the gospel of Jesus Christ propels me to be a feminist. I suspect that a lot of members, male and female, would come to a consciousness of their own feminism if
1) the term "feminism" hadn't been monopolized and politicized by Western liberal feminists
2) if the Ordain Women fiasco hadn't happened, smearing the term "feminism"
3) if we would, once and for all, eradicate all misinformation that feminism = anti-male. This leads many to believe that feminists = anti-priesthood leaders = anti-prophet and apostles = unfaithful members. UNTRUE

To me, if everyone had and lived the gospel of Jesus Christ according to the very highest standards, I think a lot more people would realize that they too are feminists. Of course, there are many definitions of "feminism" and "feminists" but at a very basic level, a feminist is one who seeks for the equality of genders in a societal system that has created and erected artificial barriers that suppress women unfairly below men solely because of her gender.
Feminists fight against such barriers-- and isn't this what the gospel of Jesus Christ is partly about? Breaking down artificial barriers and prejudices, and treating everyone as equals and with kindness?

I have always remembered what I read in James E. Talmage's Jesus the Christ so many years ago while on my mission:

"The world's greatest champion of woman and womanhood is Jesus Christ."

Jesus Christ lived in a patriarchal society where women were considered and treated as inferior to men. Yet, the Bible is filled with stories of Him breaking misogynistic social barriers to show those around him that women mattered, and that women deserved to be treated with compassion and respect, equal to that shown to the men. If Christ did not have the courage to do so, how different would the Bible be? Just imagine, what if we read that Jesus Christ

• Was rude to his mother, and instead of listening to her pleadings for his help at the wedding in Cana to solve the problem of the shortage of wine, told her instead, "Woman, you should have planned better." 
• Even at His darkest hour while hanging on the cross, ignored his mother's desperation and heartsickness, and abandoned her to fend for herself, even though he knew that John the disciple was capable of taking care of her.   
• In the name of cold, hard "justice," allowed the stoning of the woman caught in adultery
• Refused to heal the woman who secretly touched his garment.
• Rebuffed Mary and Martha's efforts to prepare a meal for him, and wouldn't even enter their home.
• Dismissed Mary and Martha's pleas to raise their brother from the dead. 

Or, what if we imagined the Four Books of the Gospels without the stories of Christ treating women with love, kindness and patience. The Bible would then become a guide on how Jesus treated the men, but it would be silent on how to view and treat women. I shudder to think of how later Christians might have taken this (already there is so much debate about Paul's words that women should not speak in church...).

This is why I believe that the gospel cannot exist without feminism. It wouldn't be the gospel if  Christ didn't show the ultimate example of how to treat those who were considered inferior. It is precisely because Christ was such a champion of woman, and so revolutionary for his time, that the gospel resonates and has so much power with people across space and time. I'm not saying that Jesus Christ was a feminist- "feminist" and 'feminism" are terms of our age, and I can't rewind time and ask Christ if He considers himself a feminist. However, I stand by my belief that the gospel teaches feminist principles.

I have listed other examples of how the gospel is feminist in nature in one of my earlier posts. There is also another BYU professor, Valerie Hudson, who also wrote this article back in 2010 explaining why feminism led her to join the LDS Church.

Hence, it's not that there wouldn't be a need for feminism if everyone knew about and lived the gospel in the most ideal way. On the contrary, feminism would thrive wherever the gospel was spread to because it teaches men to love, respect and treat females with kindness in appropriate ways (and vice-versa).

Sorry, but I'm standing with my female friends in this debate.

Motherhood Matters- HECK YES!!!

I loved this article, written by April Perry from Power of Moms, that was just published in the Deseret News on September 3, 2014. In fact, I love it so much, I'm re-publishing excerpts here (FULL ARTICLE HERE) because it has such a vital message to all mothers everywhere. Let me know what you think! 

Motherhood Matters: 6 reasons to never give up on motherhood

by April Powers

....

Never, never, never give up.

So simple, really. But that phrase has come back to me time and again, and today, I feel impressed to share it.

All of us have challenging times in our lives, and there are varying ways we might choose to give up.

Sometimes mothers mentally check out — and just stop trying. Giving up might mean permanently walking out on the family — thinking that everyone would be better off if Mom weren't there. In some heartbreaking cases, "giving up" means suicide, and children are left to fend for themselves — or make do with a new guardian who tries to take Mom's place. I know I don't fully understand the feelings that would lead to such an extreme, but I can empathize with the perspective a friend shared: "Death is easier than what I am living right now."

I'm not sure who is going to read this post, but if you have ever felt like giving up on motherhood, here are six reasons to stay strong:

1. We are not alone.

Every mother (even if she looks totally put together) has discouraging times.

We might need to look deeper and get past all the talk about room remodels, vacations and parties, but if we look carefully (and encourage honesty), we'll see that everyone else is just as human as we are.

Finding a trusted group of friends and reaching out to other moms has literally been a lifesaver for many, many women. 

...

Sometimes we just need to open up and get talking in order to find the friends we need. [And can I say this has helped me as I've opened myself and talked to friends and fellow grad students about the struggles of grad school? I  truly believe sharing, even just verbal sharing, makes burdens lighter.]

2. Children would rather have an imperfect mom who is struggling to be better than no mom at all.

Deep down we all know this, but we need to remember it — and really believe it.

I heard a story about a young man who went to live with his extended family after his mother took her own life. At his first back-to-school night, hundreds of miles away from his former life, he paused outside the doorway of his classroom and quietly said to his aunt, "Can you please just tell my teacher that you're my mom?"

This story touches my heart every time I think about it...

And I think about my children, who see me at my very worst, but love me anyway. They are so quick to forgive.

I never want my little ones to have to explain to anyone why I gave up. So I won't. I just won't give up.

3. There is beauty all around us. We just need to train ourselves to see it.

I have the opportunity to speak with mothers all around the world, and I know this life doesn't always feel beautiful.

What's beautiful about being so exhausted that you can't even get everyone out of the house? How is it beautiful when your bank account has $3.23, and it's three days until the next paycheck? Where is the beauty in children arguing over who left the milk on the counter?

It's beautiful because it's yours. Because it's real. And because it's full of potential.

Think of a lump of clay, a blank canvas, that seed covered with dirt. What about the bare maple tree in winter? Or the darkest part of the night?

It's about perspective and potential.

The way we enable ourselves to see that beauty is by polishing the lenses through which we see the world. And that's done by taking care of ourselves.

When we get away occasionally with friends, regularly make time to exercise well, eat food that fuels us, get enough rest, and remember we're people, the world looks better. (Click here for an article about getting an extra hour of quiet time each day.)

Is it hard to do these things? You bet. But we do it because it transforms our perspective on life.

4. We have a purpose that's uniquely ours.

...

[Story of author miraculously walking away, completely unharmed, after being ran over by a truck with a camper when she was only 18 months old!]

I found this website about children whose lives have been lost in back-over incidents, and not a day goes by that I don't think about my second chance.

Perhaps that's part of why I'm so purpose-driven — because I came so close to losing this opportunity to live a full life.

But here's the thing, it is so easy to get confused about our purposes. We start thinking we have to look a certain way, dress a certain way and have what everyone else has. We read an amazing blog and yearn to replicate what we see. We get frustrated with our children for "getting in our way." I have to remind myself daily to cling to my purpose — not to get distracted by the siren call of all those "extras" that look so appealing.

5. This life isn't just about us.

I have this as a rotating image on my screen saver:

...

Some days are long and stressful, and we have to work frantically just to keep up, but during those times, we can remember that our work, whether appreciated or not, is sustaining the lives of our children. That is noble. That is beautiful.

6. Today is not forever.

My friend told me the story of a mother who took a bath with her newborn baby one morning. I won't elaborate on the details, but the baby made an explosive mess, and the mother had to yell for her husband to bring a towel and help her get cleaned up. We've all had those really gross moments.

But in the midst of the yuck, she heard a little voice in her head say, "Today is not forever."

Fast-forward a couple of hours, and that same mom was sitting on the couch with her preschool son, who was climbing on her back and laughing while she tickled his legs. His arms wrapped tight around her neck, and smiles covered their faces as they enjoyed the moment.

Then she heard that same voice, reminding her of the same truth, "Today is not forever."

Whatever it is that we're cherishing at the moment — or praying we can simply overcome — our lives won't always be the way they are now.

We have choices and power to change in areas where we are weak. And we have the fortitude to get through those days that feel impossible.

...

It's my hope that each of us can accept the simple challenge to never give up on this beautiful life.

This article is courtesy of Power of Moms, an online gathering place for deliberate mothers.